Stuff happens

I'm forcing myself to write an entry so here I am. Ya know, I had all these things that I wanted to write about but my mind is blank and I can't be bothered to recap the past two days. Okay fine, I'll try.

Lets see. Saturday I went to Bangi to visit my sister and her 3 week old baby boy Aqil. Very cute. Saw his gummy smile. Can't wait till he's a bit older and can actually respond to my questions about life cuz you know how lil kids have all the answers, they just don't seem to speak our language. What's that baby movie called again? Anyway, played wooden blocks with his older brother creating traffic roads and dominoes. It was fun.

Didn't stick around so long though as I headed back home with my dad, only to go back out for Nad's surprise birthday party in Damansara Perdana with Mien. Thank you for accompany me! Didn't stick around long for that either as we rushed to Sportsbarn to play basketball for half an hour, and was totally knackered. HALF HOUR! that's pathetic. Must start jogging regularly again to increase stamina.

Then today, went to arkib negara to look for old NST articles about the Stadium Merdeka demolition. Was worried that I'd have to go through the long process of registration (as only members are allowed to enter and access their stuff) but pleasantly discovered that I'm already a member since 2004. That's right, we were looking for for info on Pudu Jail back in the day. Anyway, came back to the office, and attempted to write a script for the interstitial on Stadium Merdeka and went completely blank. -_-

Took the video home and didn't end up

* PHEW! my computer decided to re-start and I was afraid I had lost everything i typed out. Thank God that didn't happen.*

Anyway, as i was typing, didn't end up working on the script at all but instead watched 3 movies at the same time, Penelope, Sleepless in Seattle and Lost Blood (well this last one is technically not a movie but it was on HBO).

and here i am writing this out. sigh. procrastination is evil i tell you.

Start again

Bismillahirahmannirahim.

How many times have I told myself that I would try to update this thing regularly and miserably fail to do so? I stopped counting. Or never started. Same thing.

So. In an attempt to keep it 'alive' here is my first post after almost half a year has passed. And half a year of ups and downs it has been, although I must confess that despite the fact that great things have happened to me, the bad things seem to overwhelm me more. Why does that happen? Why do I make myself feel like shit when all the joy is ready and willingly able to embrace me?

Okay, so now you know lately I've felt like shit for a particular reason which I will not tell unless I intend to expose the party that has been making me feel that way. However, if you are keh poh chi and wonder whats going on in that part of my life, I do have another blog under a pseudonym, so go ahead and start wracking your brains to find it. :)

Will be back. promise promise. I know I said that before but this time its for real.

much love.

w'salam.

Letting Go

Letting go doesn't mean we don't care. Letting go doesn't mean we shut down.
Letting go means we stop trying to force outcomes and make people behave.
It means we give up resistance to the way things are, for the moment.
It means we stop trying to do the impossible--controlling that which
we cannot--and instead, focus on what is possible--which usually means
taking care of ourselves. And we do this in gentleness, kindness,
and love, as much as possible.

Melody Beattie

New Beginnings

New job.
New aspirations.
New goals.
New beliefs.
New disappointments.

Old flames.
Old habits.
Old lies.

Jeng jeng jeng.

Gmail Video Chat - woohoo!

Yay! Gmail has introduced its newest feature: video chat!

Kinda like what Skype have been renowned for but since I don't have many people on my Skype account, that's not gonna work, is it.

BUT, since almost everyone has a gmail account, that means more people to talk with!

You have to download the feature first and ensure that you have a web cam.

Must. find. web. cam. for. me.

I installed skype a year ago with hopes that i'd be able to chat live to my friends in the states, bangkok, dubai, etc since they are very dear to me and I'm just the type of person who wants to keep in touch, even if we haven't seen each other for a decade.

You know who you're friends are when after such a long time, you're still able to pick up a conversation like you just met each other yesterday for lunch.

A chip off the old block

I've no clue what the heck that means, but thought it'd be a nice subject header.
So after googling the actual meaning, this is what I found out:

"if someone is a chip off the old block, they are very similar in character to one of their parents or to another older member of their family.

Look at her bossing everyone around - she's a real chip off the old block!"

How totally irrelevant. haha.

Sorry I haven't kept this updated as much as I'd like to. Sometimes I wonder why I started it at all. Actually I lie, I know why I started it. Because at that time, I needed to vent my frustrations and had no one to turn to, so I turned to the world with hopes that someone out there would be able to hear my cries.

Along the way, this outlet never truly satisfied my needs, and it transformed into something else. An online diary. A documentation of my life - for my eyes mostly. I wanted to be able to read what I had done a year ago. To travel back into time and ponder about what I've done and the feelings that came with it.

Then the whole privacy issue came up. I dunno how much I'm willing to share with you, perhaps because I don't like being judged even though its quite human to do it. Occasionally, when I really need to let it all out, I'll pen it down on paper instead, ya know, the old school way. And it feels a lot better.

After thinking about it a bit more, I wanted my blog to be a point of reference. Mostly for experiences that I've gone through whether its got to do with my work, social life, spirituality, travels, hopes, and dreams. I wanted to share it with you. Cuz sharing is caring. And I care.

Anyway, can you believe its just a lil under 2 months left till 2008 is over? Where did the time go. Sigh. Well, I've got a few things I told myself I'd accomplish before we roll into the new year:

1. get a drivers license
2. learn to swim
3. Go to Singapore

Insya'allah.

Do You Miss Me?

I'll be back. Promise. Cross my heart and hope to die.